Hear Me Roar...with my Purse of Goodies in Stow

I did want to break up the momentum of my photographic journal a little with a "purse" full of goodies I sometimes HEAVILY sometimes lightly relied on, depending on the day of my cycle...oh wait...for the men that are reading this part, I know you're one word away from clicking the "x" button, shutting off your computer and running for the hills with that icky, gooey feeling of knowing that you are about to hear about menstrual cycles, makeup and all the other things "us women" apparently talk about every time we get together...am I right? For the other men who have sisters or have lived in close quarters with women their whole lives, I am hoping that you are rolling your eyes, shrugging your shoulders and saying "give me the goods, I can handle anything." Oh yeah, and that "one word" that I said some men need to hear in order to continue their denial of what 50% of the population goes through every month....P-E-R-I-O-D. There, I said it and I won't ever say it again. If you're still here, along with the fearless men who can "take anything" and the ever-more fearless women who live and breath this stuff everyday, I will now divulge the contents of this said "purse" I have mentioned above.

A Purse of Goodies Every Traveling Tigress Should Carry With Her While Conquering The World

1) Wax strips. There are some women who were born sun-kissed goddesses into this world, with their beautiful blond hair, blond arm, leg and body hair...yes men, all women have body hair, ALL OVER THEIR BODIES. Now, for these bodacious beauties, this body hair is called "peach fuzz." I wish you could see the smirk on my face as I write this. So there are blondes and there are brunettes who shouldn't call themselves brunettes since they share the same shade of "fuzz" that the blondies do, then there's the darkside of the moon. Hello, I'm here, that's me!!! Those of us that have lustrous characteristics that some of those blondies compliment by saying "you have a great olive complexion" or "wow, you have such an exotic look," which is FANTASTIC! Except for the little issue of the eyebrows, upper lip (which men like to call "moustache," thanks), the underarm, the legs, the back, the bikini line etc etc etc. So I am blessed with an "exotic look" and Amazon-thick, black "fuzz" all over. I might as well have paint thrown at me by animal activists since this fur that I'm "lucky" enough to be carrying also keeps me warm when the Canadian winters keep the rest of you freezing cold. It's the least I can say to comfort myself when my monthly "grooming" bill becomes its own separate expense on top of "groceries, cable, rent...EZ's grooming"...right. ANYWAY, many of the hair-removal brands have come out with their own waxing strips that don't need to be heated at all. You pull both sides apart and wax away. Hey, I know a good bikini wax is hard to find, so if you are loving the beautiful beaches of Thailand or Vietnam, these strips come in both upper lip size and larger arm-length size for all other parts of your body. Score! No pain, no gain. Good luck finding a waxing salon or putting up with razor burn in the scorching heat, not to mention the salacious sea water! 

2) This leads me to my second grooming goody: Tweezers. Eventhough the last "goody" was a total snoozer for blondies and sort-of-brunettes, this one is a universal tool for us all. I will not stress how great these little pieces of not-so-high-tech equipment are when you are having a "grooming crisis" and after you have been trekking through the jungle, or sleeping in hostels, and you don't feel so fresh, at least you won't look as gross as you feel. Plus, if you really feel like going all Macgyver, these tweezers can get splinters out, cure ingrown hairs...you know the rest.

3) Now, this is the last "icky" and "girly" part of the list, I promise. For that time of the month, if you are traveling through Asia in specific, make sure you bring enough "stuff" along with you to last through your whole trip. Unless you are comfortable wearing a diaper-like product, which is all they have in Asia and most of the Middle East. Depending on your cycles etc, BYOS (bring your own supply). There, I said my peace, now onto the fun stuff.

4) There is an ensemble that will comfort you when all you've been wearing is baggy pants and tank tops, and haven't been worrying about sweat marks or whether rolling your pants up is fashionable or not. A non-wrinkle, or scrunchable (??) summer dress and kitten-heel shoes that are the same size and weight as regular flip flops, will work wonders. As women, I always marvel at our ability to transform ourselves from one look to another, from "the mom" look to the "sex kitten" look, and so on. If you have it in you, chances are you can make it show on the outside. So go ahead, transform away. Just because you are backpacking does NOT mean you always have to look like a backpacker.

5) The next two only apply to the lot of you who will not compromise on jewelry and make-up. These were two things I was not willing to sacrifice while backpacking. I found myself two little baggies, those organza baggies are nice, and filled one with a compact that included  2 matching shades of generic pink and brown eyeshadow, cover up and charcoal liner powder. There are so many brands out there, just pick the one that looks best on you. Next is your eyeliner, mascara, lipliner and whatever else you need to look GORGEOUS! I tried to keep it to a minimum in order to seem more like a sort-of-backpacker. It worked in Europe, especially in London and Paris, where supermodels and Armani-wearing yuppies roamed the streets, and where I felt the need to wear make-up everyday. Yikes! And I was supposed to be on vacation.

6) Jewelry. It just makes me smile. My mother raised me to love all things shiny and dangly. And so I do. Her and I still exchange necklaces, earrings back and forth. It just makes me smile! I do have to admit that I was really bad on the first leg of our trip through Europe. I think that 3 kilos of my 23-kilo backpack contained my dangly, silver, faux pearl, gemstone and cosmetic jewelry. I don't like to show any favoritism when it comes to my collection, instead I take a more democratic approach by giving each one of them a chance to shine. I like to wear ALL my jewelry if I can, not all at once of course. Although, I am sure the day will come, to JT's detriment, and I will start adorning myself with all my jewelry at once when JT and I go down to meet the others for our daily bridge sessions in the lobby of our senior's home. Today, however, I bring one less shirt to make room for my "shining stars." "What a quack!" You say. I agree. We all have our little obsessions that keep us connected to home. Each piece reminds me of where I acquired it from, or who gave it to me. Of course, those little pieces of home add up to 3 kilos, but they are mine to carry. So I don't mind.

7) Deodorant! One compact size for your purse and one normal size for your backpack. Especially if you are traveling through tropical countries and you are not blessed with underachieving sweat glands. This is for your own sake and for the sake of the others that must pass you by in the street or sit beside you on the bus. Feeling self-conscious is one thing, feeling embarrassed is completely different altogether.

8) An eye-mask and ear plugs. Please trust me on this one. You will look like a princess and you will feel stupid putting the eye-mask in particular on, but if you've ridden at least one train through China, you will know how crucial these two accessories are in order to achieve a reasonable amount of beauty sleep. It also came in EXTREMELY handy when we were on a bus in Laos, watching, or rather trying NOT to watch, Lao pop videos that were on a 1-hour loop for 14 hours straight. Lao pop can be best described as a cross between a chicken being stretched and a female cat in heat. Not that Canadian Idol is any better. 

9) Bathing suit and a mini quick-drying towel. This goes along with my "Always Be Prepared" motto.

10) Nail clippers. I think I realised how important this tool was when I looked at my nicely grown-out nails and wondered how I had managed to stockpile all that gunk in there, but that was when I decided that short was the way to go, and I kept my nails that way, and clean, for the following months.

11) Wet naps, more wet naps, and even more wet naps. Because on top of the anti-bacterial hand sanitizer which is a must, these wet naps are the superheroes of any trip. They even saved us from the wafting stench of my fellow countrymen in the Blue Mosque, no offense to the utter marvel of Islamic architecture that is this house of worship and its believers, but when hundreds of people remove their shoes in the heat of July, the smell does not quite resemble that of roses. So we opened some wet naps, which almost every restaurant happily distributes in Turkey (a clever marketing strategy), put them to our noses and inhaled the equally nauseating, but better of both evils, lemon scent of the wet nap.

12) I touched upon this article when talking about the MOST important items to bring along with you while backpacking, US Dollars. This is where the money belt comes into play. Instead of storing it loose in your shoes, you can use your money belt. But, you do know that money belts don't necessarily need to be carried around the waist right? Being women with a set of breasts allows us to use these objects for a few different purposes. I'm not going to list them. I will only say that placing the money belt in, around or under the breasts is a very useful tactic and adds to the versatility of these already incredible fits of mammalism (is that a word?)

13) Finally, I won't bother mentioning a bar of soap to wash your panties and other light-weight, quick-drying clothes; I also won't stress that packing "layers" of clothes you can pile one onto the other when you get cold and take off when you get hot, like lots of tank tops, T-shirts and long-sleeved, cotton shirts, instead of heavy fleece jackets or pants is smarter and less heavy. I most certainly won't bother mentioning keeping nutrition or protein bars with you that can help you get through a rough patch when you can't find a suitable place to eat or the bus isn't stopping ANYWHERE and it's 10am and the last time you ate was 9pm.  So the last thing I will suggest is to make good friends with BOTH ibuprofen and acetaminophen. And carry them in bulk with you. 

That's my two cents. It's funny how your threshold of pain and comfort rises as you weigh them against the life experiences you receive from traveling. Of course there is no way that I'd want to be transported back to the time when I had to pee hovering over a trough with a tiny 15''x 15'' cement partition separating my crouching neighbor and I. Nor would I ever want to worry about when my cramps (sorry men) were ever going to seize while we were hiking up to a hill tribe village in the middle of the Thai jungle, but that's just it. You take it as it comes, you let it happen because THIS IS YOUR LIFE. You are still a woman, you still go through the same trials and tribulations all other women do, except that you are traveling a couple thousand kilometers outside of your comfort zone. I just remember those times we traveled through Central China or through the Thai jungle and know that I was really living with my body and mind. And I decided to focus on the natural beauty surrounding me instead of the internal obstacles inside. Mind over matter? It doesn't really matter. Do what you want, but just remember why you are where you are and enjoy it for what it is. Because if you really want to carry those complaints around with you, I'm afraid they might weigh a little more than your 23 kilo allowance.